Well it has been a month and three days now since I have been a mother of three!!! For the most part the transition of this little one to our family has been nothing but a blessing. The older girls absolutely love her! So much so that she has already had two colds in her short little life because the girls (who are always sick) will not stop kissing and hugging her. Poor baby...I am hoping that she is building up good immunities, but it is so sad to see a newborn struggle. :( On top of being sick the baby has been very gassy...like high pitched screaming, face turning red, fussy for hours, gassy! I am in the process of trying to figure out what to do about it. (If anyone has any suggestions please let me know.)
This weekend she was really bad. If I was not holding her she was screaming, which does not work very well when you have two other children and a household to run. I am pretty good at doing things one handed but there are just some things you simply can't do while holding a baby...like cleaning up rabbit pee from the kitchen floor...for example. :) Between a demanding newborn and the constant pleas of "Mom can you get me this", "Mom I need that", "Mom help me with this", "Mom where is that" it's enough to make anyone go crazy, not to mention a sleep deprived women running on one cup of decaf coffee. By the end of the day I was so worn out and trying so desperately to keep it together that I did what any other well intentioned worn out mother would do. I Sent the kids outside to play! (Amber could not decide what pants to put on so she ran out in a tank top and her underwear, and at that moment I could care less, as long as they were out of my way.) As I began trying to cook dinner with one hand, while still cradling a sad little baby in the other, I began to question my ability as a parent. Was I spending enough time with Amber? "She is the middle child now, how am I going to parent her so she does not grow up resenting her childhood" and peyton, I am pretty sure I spent most of the day ignoring her ramblings about her imaginary worlds, and all that she is learning about bugs and amphibians, "I really should pay more attention to her, what if she thinks I don't care?" As I turn towards the oven to put in dinner I hear two little girls behind me saying "Mamma, close your eyes!" "Ok, they are closed" I say, still turned towards the oven. I hear the girls opening cabinets while, whispering and giggling to one another and soon they shout "Ok mom turn around!" I turn around and they yell "Surprise!" They had picked "flowers" (weeds) and put them in a vase for me. My heart melted and I said "thank you so much, they are beautiful" Peyton said "We wanted to pick them for you mamma, because we love you so much!" Of course at that moment I was a puddle on the floor, how did they know that is just what I needed that day...reassurance.