Did you know that when a survey went out asking this very same question to huge organizations all over the world 30% said they focused on their strengths and 70% focused on their weakness. Why do we this?
This question was brought to my attention after listening to Marcus Buckingham speak at the Women of Faith conference this weekend. As I sat their listening to Marcus I became increasingly convicted on the fact that I as a parent tend to focus more on my children's weaknesses rather than their strengthens. It was brought to my attention how very backwards this way of thinking truly is.
For example: My youngest daughter Amber is not what you would call an "easy" child. From the day she was born I had this sense that she was going to be very different from my first born (who I like to call an angel baby). Amber was born with pixy in her eyes, she is extremely stubborn, short tempered, clingy, overly curious and above all trouble waiting to happen!!! In the last month she has gotten into a bottle of Zicam and thrown it up all over my poor moms blow up mattress, (She has also gotten hold of a baby Tylenol bottle and figured out how to open it regardless of the safety system on it...we luckily got it from her before she took any but not without a fight) She has also learned how to unlock the double bolted front door and numerous times I have caught her just before she made it to the middle of the street, we have had to put one of those baby door knobs on the inside of her bedroom door just to keep her in her room at night but she has recently learned how to tear them apart and get out anyways, not to mention her new found fascination with toilets and the countless times she has backed them up due to flushing inanimate objects down them. I could go on and on about this child and the fun never stops, its all day everyday!!! I have recently become aware that I complain way to much about Ambers behavior and perhaps I need to hold my tongue a bit...So if you hear me ranting PLEASE you have permission to slap my wrist...and I am serious.... I really am working on not talking about her so much in fear that she may hear me and for the rest of her life label herself as TROUBLE, and that is the last thing I want for her.
I have struggled to know exactly how to handle her behavior until this strengths vs weaknesses came to my attention...what if instead of focusing on the above written paragraph I were to tell you that Amber is in fact extremely loving and caring. Already, at one years old, we can tell she has a servants heart and looks out for others often before herself....what an amazing quality right!? She loves to be Mommy's little helper...in fact I caught her this morning trying to unload the dishwasher for me
So I made a commitment to start focusing on my children for what they are rather than what they are not. For Amber I think that means keeping her busy with chores.. LOL...my hope is that by keeping her hands busy it will keep her out of trouble...we will see how it goes. :)
1 comment:
She sounds just like my Ayla! Who at barely a year could get out of her crib, climb over the baby gate and also takes off door knob covers by just taking them apart. I have lost track of how many times I have called poison control and she can open "child-proof" lids easier then I can. Thanks, it is a good lesson to remember for our harder kids. I have often said I may have thought myself the perfect parent were it not for Ayla. She certainly makes life interesting!
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